A Parody of Recent Events

“What light through yonder window breaks?”
‘Tis the Middle East, with Freedom’s Son,
born of riot, claw, and tongue.

And what of that, The Fourth Estate?

Glenn:
A raging, vicious caliphate!

Chorus:
The people’s rising temper, sate!
The ruler’s hold a frail affair,
with Freedom’s call enough to bear.

CNN:
Oh! Zuckerburg Oh! Twitter Feed
King’s fingertips, the magic freed.

Chorus:
Let loose the dogs of Hosni’s lair,
the people gathered at the square
shall lend the East their voices there.

What tragety, what hearts doth break
to find their ruler’s grip abate
and in its stead a tighter clasp,
with spikes and terrors in its path.
Cry out, Oh! World, cry at long last!
Let rivers flow toward huddled mass
and feed the fields with water red
from wound to wound your people bled.

MSNBC:
See Engle LIVE from parapet!

And now, dear friends, a commercial break.
Note to self: Stock in OPEC.

Lights Off

Let the lampposts light the freeway tonight.
Smiling v-shape guiders. Bird stoops. Night blinders.
Let the roadway grooves shock driver’s loose,
bound eastward with their soul to lose.
Keep us coloring between them.
Pale yellow bars. Black rock. White stars.

It’s night on the freeway. 20/20.
No cars in sight.

Lights off.
Let the lampposts light the freeway tonight.

 

Reverse Entropy

I. Invocation

West to east ecliptic spin,
unwind the clock,
reverse the wind.
Let seasons pall,
and sound rescind.

Stop.
Let it start again.

II. Benediction

Rend the darkness.
Pail it out in buckets
onto side streets and back alley ways
toward those lackluster light pools
of civilization.

Let it stream down through
man holes and blind breaks
’till the depths are covered
and the salmon people swim again,
free and open, careless and quiet.

 

The Supermarket

Cart it towards the open light,
near Oprah and peppermint candy,
by stands of chocolate and small essentials,
’till the line thins, and it’s just you
and the name tag, Steven Horowitz,
who asks you, in a voice unlike
Ira Glass, “Paper or plastic?”

 

Space is Limited

Deposit encouraged but not required.
Past occupant recently fired.
Act now, expecting offers.
Rent low, won’t raid your coffers.
Seeking roommate, lifetime partner.
Won’t be demanding, bitchy, or a bother.
Quiet, unobtrusive, with vacancy open.
Looking for boarder at home by the ocean.
Amenities included with well stocked bar.
Help needed with various scars.
No applicants automatically evicted.
Act now, space is limited.

Escape

Wrap it up in plastic,
if you would. Seal it tight.
Take care that the edges and
folds line up right.

The cellophane needs to be
three inches thick,
with space for some bedrooms,
a bath, and a vent.

You’ll bury the electrical,
sewer, and cable,
leave room for additions
and tack on the label.

Seal us all in,
then write with a sharpie,
“Open on New Years, 2070.”

The Gavel

Please plead the 5th because
this testimony is going nowhere,
irrelevant and rambling,
sworn-in expert of forensic pathology.
I need to pick up my dry cleaning.

Break.
Resume.

Raise your right hand,
repeat, blah, blah, blah.
The scales are off.
Evidence obtained in suspects’ Denali.
Defense: Contaminated, Not Stored Properly.

Break.
Resume.

Call to order.
On patrol. Stored in evidence locker B-98.
District 3. Honorable Judge T—— Residing.
Reckless endangerment, possession,
murder of the 1st degree.
These robes are airy.

Break.
Resume.

Sentencing.
Ten to life.
Parole in five.
Stay alive.